I recently realized that I have more trouble lately writing anything of length. Let me rewrite this for a tweet: “just noticed – can’t write long stuff now.”
Who knows? Maybe it’s even better. I have less patience now. I switch pages if something takes longer than 5 seconds to download. This all makes sense. We only have so long to live. Why waste it waiting.
I think I have acquired a short attention span. So I texted my political expert, Jurgen, about this and asked for his help in writing the column.
Jurgen called me and launched into the following bit. While playing Mah jong on the computer, I just had to listen and take notes:
Want to remember another world a lifetime ago? Think Jean Chretien and Paul Martin. Who?
And Layton? Didn’t he say something like: Being unafraid is better than being afraid; being relaxed is better than being worried; being happy is better than being sad. So don’t be afraid, don’t worry and be happy. Can’t remember but as long as I got the gist.
On the Newsweek cover, I noticed that Obama is the first gay president. That doesn’t mean he can give you the low down on the down low. It just means that he had to struggle to figure out who he was. That makes sense. He’s the first black president who is white, the inverse of Bill Clinton. And anybody who thinks dog tastes fine with ketchup has some cultural adjustments to make.
But that would make Romney pretty gay too. He would be the first Mormon president. Think of how much he has had to adapt to fit in with Evangelicals who think he is a member of a kooky cult. Yet now, Evangelicals would swallow their prejudices, hold their noses and vote for him. How about that for making a transition? He might be ok with having more wives than Mohammed. But he hasn’t come out of the closet yet on that.
Ron Paul has finally ended his active campaigning for the presidency. Not because anyone forced him but just because he made a free and individual decision. And because he didn’t have any money. Apparently even Libertarians in American society can’t get anywhere unless they organize a movement, which is the equivalent of someone deciding to herd cats. Good luck with that.
In Canada, Mulcair and Harper are presented as slightly skewed mirror images of each other, except Mulcair has the warmer eyes, the beard and moustache and is very reassuring in his nice suit. Oh and he wants to really tax the rich and slow down the growth of the oil industry.
Harper just wants to get us all used to having a smaller government. But he realizes Canadians are junkies who need to withdraw slowly. So he is proceeding while, like an illusionist, trying to distract us with his other hand holding draconian laws on crime or letting some of his MPs open other issues.
Meanwhile, the Liberals are undertaking a kind of striptease before announcing their leader. Who is hiding behind all those veils of process and leadership race regulations? Could it be Bob Rae who is coyly but demurely flashing those big baby blues? This strategy completely confuses the other parties. They are not quite sure whom to attack yet. But one would caution them not to wait too long or the voters might not know who the leader is in the election.
Jurgen finished and I learned that sometimes it pays to just listen and nod. In this case, I got a column out of it.
Humour me please 